Have you ever heard something that completely blew your mind? It left you on the edge of your seat with more questions than answers. If you’ve experienced this, what did you do after you received the information? If you’re like most people, you may have rushed to share what you heard with a close friend or relative. But rushing to share or discuss heavy matters is not always the best course of action.
When I think about how to process such information, I’m drawn to the example Mary set in the Bible. On more occasions than one, Mary received information that left her puzzled. When she learned that she would bear a child conceived of the Holy Ghost, she asked God’s angel, “How can this be?” She didn’t rush to tell friends or family nor did she broadcast what she had heard to people in the community in which she lived. She went to the source. Then later in the Bible, we learn that she treasured weighty things in her heart. When she eventually shared the news about her pregnancy, she shared it with a close relative. She was careful, and she was discerning.
Let me offer a few examples. After Jesus’ birth, shepherds came to see Jesus and then publicized his birth to the surrounding community. We learn in Luke 2:19 that “Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart.” Further in Luke 2, we learn that when Jesus was 12 years old, he stayed in Jerusalem, even as his parents continued home. When they realized Jesus was not with them, they returned to Jerusalem and found him in the temple sitting among doctors and asking them questions. No doubt exasperated, Mary later asked Jesus why he stayed behind, and no doubt scared her, and he said that he had to tend to his Father’s, meaning God’s, business. We learn in Luke 2:51 that Mary “treasured these things in her heart.”
Once again, we see Mary confronted with information that was mind-bending, and she responded by treasuring the information in her heart. Rather than going to someone else, she reflects on it and held it to herself, likely discussing it with God. In so doing, Mary protected the information and created space for God to speak with her.
What would happen if you and I followed this example? I don’t know about you, but I have made the mistake of sharing too much too soon or sharing with the wrong person. In sharing information, I may have been seeking validation or trying to make a connection. But the ultimate person whom we need validation from and connection with is God. So, why aren’t we going to him in the first place?
When we share too much or share with people who do not have the capacity to process what we are saying, we can rouse jealousy or allow our plans to be sabotaged. I think of Joseph who was loved by his father and who kept telling his brothers – who already didn’t like him – about the dreams he was having. When he shared the dreams, he invited further scorn and hatred from his brothers.
To be clear, I am not suggesting that we can never speak with others about what we have heard. But I do believe we must be careful with when we share, what we share and with whom we share. That is the central message and the critical point I want you to take away from this post. While many know this conceptually, reminders are always helpful.
Now, sometimes we overshare as a means of deepening relationships, and other times we overshare based on a lack of discipline. But sharing too much too soon or with the wrong person can have disastrous consequences. We have an opportunity each day to grow in discernment and discipline. This will not only protect us, but it will demonstrate to God that we are trustworthy and capable of handling weighty matters. It will also keep us safe from people who do not have our best interests at heart.
I hope Mary’s example inspires you to be more judicious in what you share as well as how you hold and process critical information. I hope you also know that if God gives you a promise, you do not have to share it in search of validation. Your validation comes from God, and your promotion does too.