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© 2026 Copyright, Jennifer R. Farmer

The PR Whisperer

Author, Crisis Communications Expert, Strategic Communications Advisor

Tag: leadership

Someone Needs Exactly What You Have to Offer

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It doesn’t take a lot to make a difference. It takes presence, commitment and a willingness to be inconvenienced.

By Jennifer R. Farmer

I’m going to tell you something that may surprise you.

You may think you don’t have much to give; you see your offerings and wonder whether you can truly make a difference. But someone needs exactly what you have to offer. You have no idea how your gift can change the trajectory of another person’s life.

This was my revelation after a full circle moment.

Let me paint the picture. I got my first job at 14 through a jobs training program here in Franklin County, Ohio.  It was an initiative that offered jobs to low-income youth during the summer months, and sometimes during the school year. This was terrific for my family as we were struggling financially.

My first job through the program was with the Franklin County Department of Jobs and Family Services. My boss was a young Black woman named Tracy; although I can see her face, I regret that I cannot recall her last name. I remember her because she treated me like I was her little sister or even a daughter.

My second boss in that program was Marie Hardin. She ran the Equal Employment Opportunity division of the city of Columbus. She was more than a boss; she became a mentor and close friend. She observed my interests, passions, growth edges and took me under her wing. Eventually, she began picking me up some weekends and taking me to her house. This was a much-needed escape as we lived in a neighborhood devastated by gun violence. It was not uncommon for my family and I to fall to the ground upon hearing gunshots around us. And the first time I witnessed a dead body was in that neighborhood – outside of my house in fact after a man was shot in his head and died on the curb just feet from our porch. I’ll unpack the trauma of gun violence in another essay, but for now, I want to focus on Marie and her mentorship of me and others.

Marie lived in a middle-class Black neighborhood; the kind I didn’t know existed prior to meeting her. She later began taking me to church where her daughter Alice was a pastor. Her daughter started a charm school, and before long, we were going to restaurants learning how to sit at a table and eat properly. It wasn’t just me, often my sister tagged along, and Marie and Alice involved other Black girls. They taught us about etiquette, communicating effectively and what it looked like to thrive. I recall going on family outings with Marie, once traveling to Kentucky with her to see her son and his family. He owned horses and that was fascinating for me; I remember thinking, ‘a real Black cowboy.’ It was cool to travel, see the country, and acres of greenery. Once again, it was a pleasant escape.

Through Marie, I saw a life that I didn’t previously know existed. I now had something to dream about because Marie exposed me to it. She must have intentioned to show me that more was possible because she was always involving me in one thing or another. As an adult with children of my own, I now know how big a risk it was for my mom to allow her 14-year-old daughter to go off with a woman she didn’t know. But I so happy she did. One person can’t fulfill a child’s needs independent of community. Marie became my community.

I loved her because she invested in me without expecting anything in return. Not only did she embrace me, but when I had my first child at 22, she embraced him as well. We went from her picking me up some weekends, to her picking up me and my son. She didn’t shame me for being a young, unwed mom. Instead, she taught me how to be a woman and mother. She was an example. I saw her fully engaged with her family and her church. I learned how to cook watching her – I saw her skin fish, clean it and fry it. I observed her baking pound cakes and other sweet treats. And most of all, I saw her involved in the community she loved so much.

You can imagine my surprise when I became involved in the campaign of a local leader who is connected with Columbus City Council President Shannon Hardin, Marie’s grandson. A leader in his own right, seeing the Council President brought up so many memories of my time with his Marie. I fought back tears when I saw him at a public event. I wanted to share with him how his grandmother impacted my life. It wasn’t just work experience that I acquired – it was life experience. She was the first person who showed me that more was possible.

I offer these observations to remind you – and me – that it doesn’t take a lot to make a difference. It takes presence, commitment and a willingness to be inconvenienced. Marie would often pick me up and then drop me off. She was undoubtedly busy, but never too busy for me or the other girls in whom she invested. The world needs more women like Marie – I hope to be one.

How to Be a Leader Who is Inspiring and Influential

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Most of what I have learned about leadership I have observed from former managers and from my own triumphs and failures. One lesson stands out. When I began managing people 15 years ago, I thought having a fancy title was synonymous with influence. Over time, I learned that power is conferred based on likeability, authenticity, courage, relationships and consistent behavior. When leaders cultivate these attributes, they earn power which really means influence.

Understanding influence is essential to professional growth, and companies rise and fall based on the quality of their leadership.

How Leaders Fail

A host of factors influence a leader’s ability to succeed. To the extent that leaders fail to outline a compelling vision and strategy, they risk losing the trust and confidence of their teams. Employees want to know where a company is going and the strategy for how they will get there. Having this information enables employees to feel safe, and it allows them to see mistakes as part of the learning journey versus a fatal occurrence.

If employees and customers do not believe a company’s leadership is authentic and inspiring, they may disengage, or they may be less inclined to offer constructive criticism that can help a company innovate or help a leader improve.

Middle Managers

And it is not just the leadership at the top that matters. Middle managers play a distinct role in guiding teams. Depending on the size of a company, employees may have more access to mid-level managers than they do members of the C-Suite, meaning their supervisors and managers have greater influence on the employee and the customer experience.

Effective leadership is inspiring, and it is influential. Cultivating inspiring and influential leaders requires building relationships across the company. Leaders must be connected to both the teams they lead as well as to their own colleagues and managers. This is key as titles do not make a person a leader, nor do they automatically confer influence. These are earned through trusting relationships. This explains why some leaders can get more out of their teams than others, and why some leaders experience soaring profits and engagement while others sizzle out.

Motivation

Eric Garton said in an August 25, 2017 Harvard Business Review article “…inspiring leaders are those who use their unique combination of strengths to motivate individuals and teams to take on bold missions – and hold them accountable for results. And they unlock higher performance through empowerment, not command and control.”

To be an inspiring and influential leader requires:

Courage. The late poet Maya Angelou once said “Courage is the most important of all the virtues, because without courage you can’t practice any other virtue consistently.

You can practice any virtue erratically, but nothing consistently without courage.” Courage is required in the workplace when implementing new strategies, especially when they go against professional norms. For instance, I heard Lisa Terkeurst, bestselling-author and founder of Proverbs 31 Ministries explain her decision to move away from her company’s magazine. While the organization had long had a magazine she saw a future where it didn’t exist. In order to make the switch, she risked angering her team members and customers.

When leaders see employees who are not living into the company’s mission or engaging in behavior that may undermine their long-term success, it takes courage to risk momentarily hurting an employees feelings or angering them, to tell the truth. Similarly, it takes courage to listen to constructive criticism without taking it personally or holding a vendetta against the person or persons raising the issue. In business, courage is a necessity for being an inspiring and influential leader.

A commitment to face your internal struggles. If you feel great about yourself, enter a leadership position. You are likely to be triggered in ways you didn’t think possible. You are also likely to receive feedback that may leave you second-guessing yourself and your leadership skills. The truth about leading others is you get to a point where you realize that it is difficult to take people to places where you yourself haven’t gone. To be an influential and inspiring leader, you have to face your own demons and vow to continually improve. Influential leaders take their personal evolution serious and they invest in coaching, therapy and mindfulness to ensure that their personal struggles do not overshadow their professional development.

A willingness to accept feedback. An inspiring and influential leader is not afraid to accept feedback. In fact, they actively solicit it. They understand that everyone in their life has a lesson to teach them and they are willing to accept it. Inspirational leaders understand that feedback is neither good nor bad, but rather an offering that is critical to growth. Even when it hurts or is an affront to the ego, influential leaders understand that feedback is critical to their ability to lead.

Likability. Some people will argue that leaders need not worry about being liked but should instead focus on being respected. I disagree. Both are important. When team members like their boss, and believe their boss likes them, they are more likely to go the extra mile to fulfill departmental or organizational goals. Likable leaders are moved to the front of the line when it comes to being influential. Relatedly, when colleagues feel they are disliked by management, they experience internal stress and can spend unnecessary time focusing on the source of their manager’s discontent versus the work they have been hired to do. So, likability is important for both the leader and the people she leads.

Vulnerability. Vulnerability is critical for being an inspiring leader. People want the truth. They admire leaders who can occasionally demonstrate vulnerability. It promotes deeper relationships and inspires trust. When a leader can showcase vulnerability appropriately, they destroy the illusion that one must be perfect to be a leader. They also demonstrate that vulnerability is not a dirty word; they too can be vulnerable and ask for a helping hand when necessary.

Authenticity. Authenticity is about living up to one’s stated values in public and behind closed doors. Influential leaders are authentic. They set live out their values and use those values to guide their decisions. The interesting thing about leadership, is people are not looking for perfect leaders. They are, in part, looking for leaders who are authentic.

A true understanding of inspiration. Effective leaders are inspirational. They understand the power of words and deeds and use both strategically. Inspiring leaders appropriately use stories and narratives to enable the teams around them to see common situations in an entirely new light. Inspirational leaders also showcase grit and triumph, while convincing the people around them that success and victory is attainable. Finally, inspiring leaders encourage the teams they lead to tap into their own genius. I guess they convince others that genius is not reserved for a select few, but that most people have it in them.

As fellow LifeHack.org contributor Emilie Chu observes, “A leader creates visions and motivates team members to work together towards the same goal.”

An ability to see the humanity in others. Inspiring and influential leaders see the humanity in others. Rather than treating their teams as mere tools to accomplish organizational goals, they believe the people around them are unique beings with inherent value. This means knowing when to pause to address personal challenges and dispelling with the myth that the personal is separate from the professional.

A passion for continual learning. Inspiring and influential leaders are committed to continual learning. They invest in their own development and take responsibility for their professional growth. These leaders understand that like a college campus, the workplace is a laboratory for learning. They believe that they can learn from multiple generations in the workplace as well as from people from diverse racial and ethnic backgrounds. Influential leaders proactively seek out opportunities for learning.

No one said leadership was easy, but it is also a joy. Influencing others to action and positively impacting the lives of others is a reward unto itself. Since leadership abounds, there is an abundance of resources to help you grow into the type of leader who inspires and influences others.

Jennifer R. Farmer, aka The PR Whisperer®, is an author, lecturer and strategic communications adviser for socially conscious organizations, leaders and celebrities. Follow her on IG/Twitter using @pr_whisperer.

 

Building a Brand from the Inside Out

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Building a Brand from the Inside Out

by Jennifer R. Farmer

Put your money where your mouth is. We’ve heard this phrase since early childhood. It usually implies the tried and true lesson of say what you mean and do what you say, or it can literally mean spending time or money on causes or issues you claim of personal importance. But it is also critical in internal business practices, both for protecting the workplace culture and also the organization’s reputation. As public relations professionals, we have the responsibility to advise colleagues, company leaders, as well as clients to adhere to the organization’s mission statement in both external and internal communications. Building a brand must start from the inside out.

Many of us have had professional experiences that did not match up with what was claimed on the website or sold in an interview. Being victim to bait and switch advertising in hiring has farther reaching consequences than unhappy employees. Once an organization develops a reputation for poor internal culture, the effectiveness and credibility of the business itself is at stake.

The tragic downfall of Thinx CEO Miki Agarwal is a prime example. The fiercely feminist company selling “underwear for people with periods” was known for its shocking NYC subway advertisements, which even seemed to overshadow the company’s cause; however, the campaign was so successful in awareness raising, it also brought to light the mismatching HR practices with the feminist ideas the company promoted. Accused of horrible benefits at best and worst sexual harassment at worst, Agarwal made a less than heroic exit, and the company’s reputation was ruined.

As progressive communicators working on social impact campaigns, implementing fair and equal practices in the workplace is critical to effectively communicating our message. To become a brand people trust, your people must trust their leadership and each other.

That means building a team of individuals that will not only work hard, but work well together. Many organizations go through standard team building exercises and personality tests, but nothing replaces a natural commitment to collaboration and inherent respect for one another and new ideas. Often attitudes are most affected by the internal environment and what is allowed to become “normal” or “standard”. Avoid an internal PR crisis by committing to a transparent, authentic, and morally sound work environment, just as you would advise your company or clients in external communications.

Inspirational speaker Alexander den Heijer has said, “When a flower doesn’t bloom, we change the environment in which it is growing, not the flower.” Whether building, reorganizing or adding to a team, implement the right organizational practices, attitudes and leadership that will allow a team, the company, and its message to thrive.

Jennifer R. Farmer is a strategic communicator and the author of “Extraordinary PR, Ordinary Budget: A Strategy Guide.” Connect with her by following Facebook.com/Tips4ExtraordinaryPR.

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